Friday, September 18, 2015

Med School Recap, Week 7: You Had Me at Glycolysis

Or... Four More Weeks Until Block Break!

1. I guess this is the point where we start counting down the weeks left rather than the ones completed. I suppose I should feel proud that I've hung on through seven grueling weeks of 24/7 Science. We've actually completed two of our seven (eight?) courses, so I probably should feel accomplished in that regard. I would, if I had the time to stop and ponder it. As of now, I'm a little foggy.
2. One of the things that I've experienced this week is a bit of a jolt to my attitude. I guess you could say I've been a bit of a whiner (HB might say more than just a bit!), because things have been hard over the last couple of weeks. I have been feeling extremely overwhelmed and tired, and I've questioned whether I've got what it takes to get through all of this tedious studying. I was driving home on Thursday, and I started thinking about how I've always loved to learn, and I've always enjoyed the challenge of learning stuff that a lot of people consider impossible. I remembered several times when I was younger that I would teach myself things that were supposed to be way over my head simply because I enjoyed the challenge. Somewhere along the way, I tripped across things that I put in the category of "I don't care to know that." That list has gotten so large, it would probably fill several books at this point. I managed to get through my undergrad skirting things that I felt like just weren't worth the time it would take to understand. Now I wish that I had taken the time to understand a lot of those things, because they are coming up in a BIG way in medical school. See, you can learn just enough to pass, and maybe even make a decent grade, but it's really in your best interest to learn as much as you can, because it's all building blocks. When you get to the part where you're building on what you SHOULD have learned back there, it all crumbles over those details you should have understood in the foundations. So I was knocked over the head with the fact that I've become lazy with learning. It kinda broke my heart, because I've always been an insatiable learner.
3. I guess it might be a little late to try to knock these three tests coming up this week completely out of the park, but it is my goal to find a way to get on the right track in these last few weeks. I'm definitely starting Block 2 off with a MUCH better attitude. Yeah, even if I graduate in the bottom of my class, I'll still be called doctor. But God didn't put me here on this earth to accept mediocre. I want to walk across that stage with the confidence that I threw my very best effort and positive attitude into everything I attempted.
4. If you've made it through my personal pep-talk so far, congratulations. I hope that my struggles somehow encourage someone that reads to re-examine their motivations and commit to going all in.
5. I have missed my family so much the last few weeks! I'm hoping to carve out some hours with them even though the next few weeks seem to look even crazier. Zion had an out of town game last night, and apparently he brought his A-game! I'm so proud of him, AND he turned 16 this week! I am so looking forward to having a driver in the house. It's been way too long since I've been able to send a kid on a soda run. Add that to NOT living in the boonies, and it's just all kinds of win. That man I married -- I sure miss him! Block break cannot come too soon! Bo is still recovering from his syndesmosis surgery, and I know he's looking forward to having both feet on the ground. And Mack is owning the volleyball from what I'm hearing. Next home game, I'm so there!
6. Thank you all for reading and praying and thinking about me. Sometimes I feel like I'm in a hole all by myself, and when someone says they read my updates and are praying for me, it really is encouraging. Until next week!

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